Guerilla Hygenics and Dental Warfare

Magnesium Honey

2007-03-19T22:10:00.000-07:00

Abnormally normal
they're strangley divine
laid out before me
they tug at my mind

They draw me towards them
as they paint me a dream
and for ages I'll follow
this unnatural stream

In waves now they crash
on the shores of my trance
cyan, amber, thick silver
in the black now they dance

I've known them before
in a place long forgotten
here they've come back to life
on this Boulevard Rotten

How sweetly they sway
my lackluster sick season
as my serenity grows
from asphyxiant reason

As they lead me away
white blindness burns bright
while I travel unruly
'long my syrupy lights

Mitch All Together

2006-05-01T04:34:00.000-07:00

There was a really cool Mitch Hedberg tribute last night at the Orpheum downtown. A lot of really good comedians including Dave Attell, Patton Oswalt, Nick Swardson, Doug Benson and Mike Birbiglia performed. For the few out there who haven't heard Mitch's stadup, go check out his last album, Mitch All Together. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0000DZ3HR/sr=8-1/qid=1146483472/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-0379104-0476159?%5Fencoding=UTF8

Included with the album is a DVD with his Comedy Central special.

"I think Pringles initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles is a laid back company. They said "Fuck it. Cut em up.""-Mitch Hedberg

"Young comedians are always trying to ape someone else. Even when they're good you can always tell where their influence was. "This guy is doing Seinfeld with a twist" or "That guy is doing Sam Kinison toned down a notch." And then you see someone like Mitch, and it's like his brain was put in backwards."-Conan O'Brien

Webcomics and Whatnot

2006-02-08T11:40:00.000-08:00

I am a huge webcomics geek and want to get this outta my system. Most blogs have a links section or something labeled "if your bored and looking for something to do..." blah blah blah. Take note, these aren't things for you when you're bored, this are comics that, if you have the same sense of humor as I do, I really think you should be reading. Very funny stuff and many different styles of humor. At least check them out, chances are you'll find something you like.

Rob and Elliot(http://www.robandelliot.cycomics.com/)
-A relatively new comic on the scene, done by Clay and Hampton Yount. A much more standard style of comedy. Jokes and pop culture references reminiscent of Family Guy/The Simpsons. Hardly ever has their been a continuous plotline, and it is updated less than most of the other comics here. If you aren't a big comic reader yet, this is one you might wanna check out. (The two also write weekend filler comics for Sluggy Freelance.)

Spacetree(http://spacetree.com)
-Not a comic, but a flashtoon. And yes, I know most flashtoons suck, but this one is top notch, trust me. Centers around the absurd adventures of a tree, a dumb blonde kid, a fat green kid, and all of the stupid people they befriend/kill along the way.

Sluggy Freelance(http://www.sluggy.com)
-An older comic(Originated in 1998 I believe) about the misadventures of freelance bums Torg and Riff, their roommate Zoe, her bewitched friend Gwynn, and Torg's murderous pet rabbit, Bun-Bun. Has become more of an adventure comic filled with jokes over the past few years. If you want something with a little more substance, Sluggy is the comic for you.

Penny Arcade(http://www.penny-arcade.com)
-I know that I probably don't need to tell anyone about this. It's the biggest webcomic out there by a long shot. Violent, vulgar, and absurd, it's got it all. Very funny. If you're a geek and you don't read this, go do so. NOW.

VGCats(http://www.vgcats.com/) -Gaming comic very similar to Penny Arcade, only toned down a bit. The best choice for anyone out there who is into video games but isn't a full fledged geek.

Nothing Nice To Say(http://www.nothingnice.com)
-The worlds first online punk comic. Up the Punx. (Whatever the hell that means)

Joe and Monkey(http://www.joeandmonkey.com/)
-A guy named Joe who owns a talking monkey and fights a klepto robot. If you have'nt already clicked on the link, what the hell's wrong with you?

Since When Does The Muslim World Care About Bush?

2006-02-08T10:06:00.000-08:00

Apparently, President Bush has called for an end to violence in the Muslim world that was triggered by cartoons of the prophet Mohammed. I wasn't aware that Muslim extremists were under his jurisdiction. The man is waging a war on Muslim extremists, and he's one of the most hated figures in the Arab world right now. I wonder if he really believes that he can make a difference here or if he's just looking for another photo op with a middle eastern figurehead? Wait, nevermind, I just answered my own question.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/02/08/bush.jordan.ap/index.html

Now That All That's Over...

2006-02-07T13:17:00.000-08:00

Spaced out and forgot about this blog until a friend linked me to his the other day. Besides, that first post took a lot out of me and I felt a 7 month break was in order. Anyways, I suppose I outta give a mission statement/explanation for this thing. I started this last summer at a time when I was really confused about the universe and the way things are, and in the time since my perceptions haven't cleared up at all. Chalk it up to me avoiding any and all philosophy in order to clear my head. In any case, I'd like to get this thing going again and maybe get some answers to my questions, or if all else, open you up to some questions that you'd like answered yourself.

I don't intend this to be 100% deep thinking and meaningful questions, just an outlet for my deranged ramblings and a place to post anything that I think is funny and or interesting. I had a teacher once tell me that my mind was a long string of nonsense broken up every now and then by a flash of brilliance. I'm not quite sure what will come of this thing, but I'd expect something like that.

Sorry for the delay,
-Gavrilo

On Free Will

2005-06-08T21:48:00.000-07:00

For quite some time I had been an adamant supporter of the idea that all beings had free will. I had always thrown the term predetermination in with religion and predestination. Anyone who honestly believed that we were all destined from birth to live a certain way, I felt, was insecure and irresponsible, desperatley looking for someone or something else to pass all of their faults and problems onto. I had read quite a bit of Sartre and a little of Camus, both of whom seemed to make a great deal of sense. I loved the thought that "Man is condemned to be free". Free will was fact in my eyes, up until the day I began to read Ernest Nagel. I knew a little about Nagel's philosophy, which is why I hadn't read any of his work. I knew that he was an advocate of determinism. At this point I was sure that determinism was a joke, a crutch for the weak minded and another mechanism used by the church to control and subject way back when. So, not truley knowing much of Nagel himself, I excpected find another religious zealot spouting about how god had choosen each of us to blah-blah-blah. After I began reading, however, it became clear that this man was not only very intelligent, but he was not a clergyman either. After reading more of his work, I began to try to combine both schools of thought, but simply couldn't. Free will and determinism simply cannot coencide. I thought for quite some time about the choices I made in everyday life. I found that all of them were based on my personality and common thought, which were based on my previous expiriences, which were caused by earlier events, these being caused by even earlier events, all of which can be, theoretically, traced back to the beginning of time itself. For example, I am, at the moment, writing the first entry in my blog. This is because I feel the need to express and share my ideas. I need to express and share my ideas, some would say, because I'm an over-opinionated jackass with too much free time on my hands. If this is true, then it is true that I have too much free time on my hands because it is summer and I am not in school. Most public schools, including mine, have a summer vacation because, according to education historian Kenneth M. Gold, families traditionally take summer vacations, long ago public schools could not afford to stay open all year, and for quite some time it was believed that summer education was inferior. Anyways, there is a long list of factors that lead up to the posting of this rant, all which can be traced back one way or another to the beginning of time itself. This school of thought is validated by one of the universe's most basic principles, that of cause and effect. For every effect, there is a cause of some sort, for nothing can happen without some sort of force guiding and creating it. Therefore, according to causal determinists, aren't all of my actions based on some series of causes prior to my acting them out? Based on everything that has happened and been, are my thoughts and decisions not inevitable? Can we really choose to do what we want, or are our choices and desires based on what we have been preprogrammed by the universe to choose and desire? One might say "Who cares? It doesn't matter whether or not I have free will, because it doesn't change matters either way. If am predetermined to do something, then i'll do it, and it won't matter. It is the action that matters, not the infinite cause or reason behind it." This is what I thought at first. I told myself this over and over, because for a time I wasn't ready to deal with the loss of my once cherished free will. The overall importance that this leads to is not found in the original argument over free will and determinism. The signifigance is tied into the idea of justice. Let's say a man robs a bank. Do the outside factors in the universe that lead him to commit robbery leave him exempt from punishment? Can he be blamed for all of these things? It was existence itself that shaped his state of mind and his morality. Perhaps a parental figure in his childhood condoned stealing, perhaps they robbed stores themselves. Or maybe he had lost his job and needed money to feed his family. He had lost his job because his company had gone out of buisness. The company went out of buisness because the manufactured a product that had been replaced by some technical innovation. The innovation was created because of a social need to do things faster and with more efficiencey. This need was created because of the common belief that progress is divine and nessecary. Can the man be blamed because his mind and situation are the product of such a universe? At the same time, when we begin to believe in this determinism stuff, it can become an excuse. If we are not responsible, than techinically we shouldn't be punished, which can lead to crime and violence. I will leave you with a couple of questions that have been swirling around in my head for a while, and that I hope someone reading this can help me answer. If causal determination is true, do we still have responsibility? Can society still function under this principle? Please tell me what you think.

On a completely unrelated note, if you're bored and looking for something comical, check out the tree at http://spacetree.keentoons.com/episodes.html